Bow Chicka Bow Wow

This week’s Breastfeeding Blog Hop topic is Sex and Breastfeeding.

A lactation consultant came to our house for a home visit when E was 2 weeks old. I was having a break down and was ready to give up nursing altogether. She was a great help with nursing and also left me with a surprising fact about nursing women: orgasm can trigger a letdown. The reason? Oxytocin. The same hormone that causes the letdown reflex is released during sex. I did not learn this in my birth class!


Can’t wait to see what search engine terms lead people to this entry.

My libido was non-existent for a long time after E’s birth. I was dealing with breastfeeding issues, a new baby, and no sleep. I would’ve rather taken a shower or a nap than get busy. I was also looking at my post pregnancy body and trying to figure it out. I’m not even going to go into the lochia (ick). I’m thankful I didn’t have to deal with any tearing, stitches, or scarring from labor.

The first few weeks of breastfeeding after E was born were filled with nursing him, pumping my milk, and repeating all day. My breasts no longer seemed sexual. Heck, they didn’t even seem to belong to me. They were functional and providing my baby with nourishment. A friend came up with the best term for how it felt: my breasts were no longer fun bags, they were feed bags. All the nursing and pumping left me feeling very touched out.

In what was supposed to a be a sweet gesture, my dear husband D bought me lingerie for my first Christmas as a mother. I might not have had the best reaction to it. I asked him what the hell was wrong with him? The last thing on my mind was sex, let alone actually putting some thought into what I was going to wear for sex! His response, “I wanted you to know that I still find you incredibly beautiful and that I love your body. We don’t have to use this now. I’m ready whenever you are ready.” Cue melting and me feeling like a jerk.

Things have gotten much better since then. We have a routine and sex is a part of it. E starts off in his crib and ends up in our bed so we need to take care of business efficiently. I have even bought some nursing lingerie!

D & I were lucky enough to spend the night away at a posh hotel while my parents were in town for the holidays. They watched E for the night while we got to reconnect. We ended up going away on the same day the lactation consultant had come to our home for a consultation. One year later, true to her word, I leaked on the bed.

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3 thoughts on “Bow Chicka Bow Wow

  1. Aha! I'm a childbirth educator, and I still didn't put 2 and 2 together…and I leak every time I have an orgasm (not very often)! So interesting.

    A posh hotel would be nice. Although for me, it would probably end up the way it did in the show “Up All Night.” We would have some great….sleep.

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  2. I love that show, but I must've missed that episode! I was thankful for a full night's sleep (my first in a year), but I kept getting up because the baby wasn't next to me. So much for that!

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  3. Thank you for posting this! I too really struggled with breastfeeding in the first 6 weeks. Low supply, supplementation with a bottle, nipple confusion, refusal to latch, mastitis, pumping numerous times a day with a newborn, logs for pumping/wet and dirty diapers, and exhaustion were all big challenges that I faced. What helped me beat them and continue breastfeeding was the support of my mother and breastfeeding friends, a great lactation consultant, 2 breastfeeding support groups, and perseverance.

    And I can so relate to your comments about skeevy traffic. I posted about the What's Your Nude Campaign to urge bramakers to make bras in nude shades suitable for darker skintones. I was disgusted with some of the search traffic that got me. Can't believe people would be doing that with breastfeeding.

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